The passing of 2006

Current mood: quixotic

For me 2006 was a year of change. I've shifted back into gear as the Aden I always knew and loved. I struggled through the mire of temping for companies who made the office in Office Space look like a gem. I struggled to let go of a future that really wasn't right for me. I turned my apartment into a bright and cheerful place, filled with color and friends. Most of all I found a city that feels like a great home for my personality. 2007 will see me through another "0" birthday, so I think the changes aren't quite finished yet...

What about the lot of you? Cheesy reflections to share? Step right up! Don't be shy! How has 2006 treated you? Will you be saying goodbye to an old friend tonight or farewell to a foe?

Observation

The inevitable truth that seems to accompany the passage of time, is that you will change, those around you will change, and at some point things that once seemed familiar will become unfamiliar.

Nostalgia typically greets me in the morning

Current mood: artistic

I spoke with my childhood best friend yesterday. I always love talking to her. It feels like no time has passed. Except now she's married and has a kid..but those are just details.

I spoke on the phone last night with my ex. It was a nice conversation. We talked briefly about Christmas past. We've spent several together.

This morning I shaved my legs and it reminded me of high school.

That's right kids, I've got it bad
...The Nostalgia...

You have to watch for that S.O.B. he'll come hunt you down. You'll be minding your business talking about nothing when suddenly you feel the tap tap tapping of memories at the back of your brain. Sure you go to them. Feeling the old memories (which are never how anything actually happened, just how your mind compartmentalized stuff) seems like a noggin massage. Problem is, it's hard to live in the moment when you're living in the past.

Dear The Nostalgia,

I guess you win this time. I have changed my profile pick to my yearbook photo from fifth grade as an offering. Now will you leave me alone? You asshole.

Sincerely,
Aden

Choosing healthy living

Current mood: full

I'm starting to think that just eating pie for dinner every night is a bad plan. But it tastes sooooo good. Oh pecaumpkin pie, you are a blessing and a curse.

My fancy new downtown job

Current mood: happy

Well I think I'm going to like it there!! They gave me a very warm welcome this morning.

They put together a lovely greeting package which included
* a copy of the Onion
* a spiral bound, hardcover, artists sketchbook
* a pen
* goldfish crackers
* organic, chocolate-chip, animal crackers
* paul newmans, organic, sandwhich-cookie bites
* an odwalla snack bar
* an organic chocolate, endangered species "bug bite."

On top of all that they also gave me a pet goldfish and fish food for it! So sweet.

Orientation was a lot of information to take in all at once but everyone is very kind and up-beat. They took me and the other new hire out for lunch at a fantastic mexican restaurant. I had the most delicious enchilada vegitales, with green beans on the side.

I won't be doing any writing initially. The contracts and projects aren't solidified yet. In the meantime I'm working more on the research and development side of things.

My manager seems really good, and fun to work with. We had a lot of good laughs today (he does improv comedy too.)

All in all, I'd say it was a successful first day. Plus I love being in the heart of downtown!

Screw You Guys, I'm Goin' Home

Current mood: excited

It's official. I'm going home for Christmas! Wee Ha! This will be my first Christmas at home in a long long time. One Christmas here, two in Korea, at least one or two back in Colorado. This is a momentus occasion!!

Looking forward to warm family dinners, cold weather, old friends and the best locally made chai in the world (That's right Heartsong, you better make extra...I'm coming to town).

Currently listening: A Charlie Brown Christmas: The Original Sound Track Recording Of The CBS Television Special By Vince Guaraldi Trio Release date: 19 September, 2000

Get stuffed.

Current mood: amused

Last night I dreamed of high fashion, and shoes. I must be preparing for tomorrow night's gig. In my half awake state I imagined that the reason I had to keep hitting the snooze button was because I had to choose which female beauty I was going to try to emulate today. Then I woke up all the way.

Today is my final day in MORTGAGE. As you can well imagine this job has been a piss poor match for my personality. I like alot of the people I work with, but I think I've only met one person there who actually seems to belong.

Monday I start my new carreer as a writer. Woo hoo!! Then it's Turkey day! Next week is going to be pretty awesome.

Last year I spent Thanksgiving with Matt and his sister. It was small but it still felt family like. This year I join the ranks of unpartnered Turkey eaters. I guess I'll have to make a thourough list of all the things I'm thankful for this year, and make it extra long.

Cold wind, sweet potatoes and chemical overload

Current mood: groggy

I had a veggie sandwhich with roasted sweet potatoes today. GENIUS!

In other news, there was some sort of chemical drain cleaner accident in the building I'm currently working in. Initially it smelled like hard-boiled eggs which led to lot's of little jokes and giggles. The initial stink gave way to some major problems (and by major I mean worse then the smell of hard-boiled eggs, but probably not life-threatening). At some point, being as sensitive as I am with tendencies toward being a hypochondriach, I started feeling woozy and dizzy and thought I would just put my head down for a minute. My co-worker resucued me, asking if I'd like to go outside for fresh air, which I did. The cold, season-appropriate air snapped me out of it. Good. Nice air. Me likey. When I went back into the office to finish up what I had been working on, I was really struck how all of the busy mortgage bees just kept buzzing as more and more people started coughing and wheezing. I only stayed thrity minutes more. When I left everyone was still busy at work. One of my co-workers called out "have a good night, enjoy the fresh air."

Poor mortgage prisoners.

I drove home with the windows down.

On the changeable nature of life and living...

Current mood: contemplative

I think all holidays should involve wearing costumes. I went to lunch with a friend yesterday, and didn't warn him I was wearing wings. Becuase it was Halloween of course, noone flinched, in fact people grinned at little pixie (agressive tooth-fairy) me. I'm pretty sure that would not have been the case during other times of year.

So I did celebrate. I crashed a party full of people I enjoy, and dealt with the awkward feeling of thinking I didn't belong. Absolutely worth it, I loved seeing that people put even greater effort into their costumes than I did.

It's now November 1st. I'm glad. I feel the days are inching closer to my new me. It feels like I'm metamorphosizing (sp?). I'm growing wings. I spoke with my soon to be new manager and there is a good chance we will be doing lot's of traveling in the coming months. The plane rides will bring me to one of the greatest cities in the world, and in that process I will be more accessable to family and to one of my dearest friends.

While my life has unexpectedly taken a turn away from the familiar, and I have to deal with some serious questions and self-analysis. I can't help but get excited as I come closer and closer to me. To knowing me, to loving me, to trusting me. Important emphasis.

Life has new things in store for me. I'm ready!

Currently listening: Dream Cafe By Greg Brown Release date: 23 March, 1992

micromanagee micromanagers

Current mood: refreshed

This weather is lifting my spirits like I never would have believed. I feel so vibrant and good today.

YET, as I strolled past one of the big-wigs at work today, I happened to give an audible sighing exhale. It felt good and cleansing. Apparently the sound of it caused some degree of concern for this managerial character. I was ordered to smile. Man, that pisses me off. Good mood to bad mood 15 seconds tops.

You can ask if I got the memo, you can tell me all about the restructuring of process flo, but don't try to regulate my face. You don't know what I'm feeling inside.

Don't worry though, I've recovered. Back to my cheerful, enjoying this incredible gift-of-a-day, self.

To celebrate Halloween or to skip it....

Current mood: blank

SO... Halloween, which should be the most fantastic holiday of the year (since it involves constumes and constumes are grand) is just around the corner. BUT I'm not feeling it. So I need help here, and I'm requesting input. Do I celebrate or do I stay home? If I do go party like a banshee, which costume should I recycle: Pirate/wench or Tooth fairy/zombie?

Help me please.

Thank you.

Boo.

(my apologies for the indecisive nature of this blog... sometimes you've got to know when to reach out for help)

Currently listening: Stereo Type A By Cibo Matto Release date: 08 June, 1999

Perhaps I can join the ranks of grownups now

Current mood: bouncy

I've been hired to WRITE!! I won't start my job for several weeks yet, but I couldn't be more excited! Well I could be more excited but then maybe I would be out of control excited, and that really equals messy excited, and truth be told... nobody wants that.

So, I'll have me a grownup job, and be on salary, and have benefits and (this one goes out to Matt in Montana ) Law School will have to go on without me!

Currently listening: Details By Frou Frou Release date: 13 August, 2002

funny like that

Current mood: geeky

"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."

If that ain't the truth!!

Old man sitting in a coffee shop this morning.

Current mood: touched

The old man sat at a table in the corner. Although the table was set up to seat four, he sat alone. He was talking to himself not at all quietly and to the passive observer it seemed clear that this old man imagined that he had a companion with him in the coffee shop, with whom he was sharing some account. The words of his story were not easy to distinguish; however his voice could be clearly heard all the way across the room. Even so, the other patrons of the café carried on with their own business and conversations ignoring the storyteller near the window.

The straw hat that rested gently on the old man..s head looked fairly new, or at the very least well kept. He smiled while he talked, his animated face showing that the details of whatever tale he was weaving were warm memories drifting from the far reaches of his mind to his twinkling eyes. Chuckling he picked up his ice tea and took a sip. He wore a clean, well-pressed shirt and his brown wing-tip shoes were polished and tidy. His eyebrows had grown bushy with time and clearly his bones had grown smaller judging by the high placement of his slacks and belt on his hips.

In front of him he had placed a radio. It was one of those dual cassette, am/fm, single CD things that you might find in a cheerleaders practice session, or a teenagers room. Perhaps this was the answer to the mystery. Perhaps this was the great listener for his story. Occasionally as he spoke he would tap his toes on the red, stained concrete floor. The old man appeared to be relaxed, almost gleeful as he enjoyed his morning, remembering the experiences of his youth.

Eventually as he giggled and spoke his attention seemed to drift. His glance shifted from inside his memories to outside the window and his expression became more serious. His previous glee had been replaced by something else, sorrow perhaps and his story came to an abrupt halt. He sat in silence for a short time and then he stood up refolded his jacket as if he were going to leave, instead returning to his seated position at the café table draping the jacket across his lap.

He took another sip of ice tea and continued his story, but it didn..t last. His interest in storytelling had gone away, and he stood up one final time. Checking carefully that he had the chord for his portable stereo, he draped his jacket over his arm, picked up his belongings and moved towards the door. He paused just outside the window of the café and took in a deep breath of early autumn air, glanced around quickly, and departed.

my stupid bad hair day

Current mood: bitchy

I woke up this morning to the realization that I am indeed a high-maintenance girly frickin' girl. Even typing this sentence makes me grimmace, but I've got this sneaking suspicion that once I purge this pukey mood into my blog for all of you lovely readers to subject youreslves to, I'll be able to go back to being myself.

I rolled out of bed and onto the scale. Two pounds of weight gain (keeping in mind that even a five pound fluctuation is normal). I showered. My bleached out hair felt crappy and wouldn't behave itself. I tried to get dressed and hated my entire wardrobe (which at this point is so plentiful it has exploded out into my entire living space). Somehow I convinced myself that those two pounds meant that none of my clothes fit. Silly girl thought. I eventually settled on my over sized, bagged out environmental center long-sleeve tee from College, and entertained the thought that my inner hippie was simply trying to overcome my city slicker side.

Throughout my day I have changed my hair from two braids, to one bun, to two little buns down at the nape of my neck, to one high bun, back to two braids, back to two buns, with a headband, with no headband.....repeat....repeat... at least a gagillion times.

I just got off the phone with my friend. I'm invited to a party. Party clothes? Party hair. AW, FUCKING HELL!!!

silly girls and their silly appearance... I'm one of 'em!!!!...................shit.

Did I mention that today is day two of my "lady days"?

Hm, well I was right. I do feel better.

I purchased a car

Current mood: accomplished

I have moved into the ranks of a real petroleum product dependent. I got Fahrvergnugen. No silly little car for me after all. I chose something that feels heavy on the road and really picks up the speed when you hit the gas. Plus it has pretty blue and red lights inside.

Currently listening: Pink Moon By Nick Drake Release date: 06 May, 2003

My recent obsession

Current mood: flirty

Till I actually go test one of these out, I have become obsessed with this....

Happy Hour

Current mood: thirsty

It's silly that they call it Happy Hour. I can be happy whenever I want to. Tonight apparantly I wanted to be "happy" till sometime past 3 in the AM.

Why cleaning women are truly remarkable beings.

Current mood: relieved

So I returned from tour, which you may or may not know ran into some issues and challenges along the way. We had terrible weather. One of our band members had some personal stuff to attend to. I'm gonna keep this short and cryptic, but the tour did not go anything near the way it was planned to, in fact we only got to play one gig...never even made it to New York. Upshot...I got to sit in the second row behind the Orioles dugout at a a ball game in Baltimore.

Picking up where I started... So, I returned from the tour. I was tired. I was exhausted. I was emotionally and physically fatigued. I really needed to crawl into the dark hole I call my apartment and recuperate. Got to the door, and the work that was being done on my floor was not only left unfinished, but the entire apartment was a mess. Naturally (those of you who know me well should not be surprised by this) I flew into an absolute panic. A real my life sucks, and it's the end of the world kind of emotional spiral. The construction dust was everywhere--on the floor, on the walls, on the ceilings, in my closet...in my silverware drawer!!!!

Enter the cleaning woman, check that, cleaning women who have saved me from the pits of despair. To the women who have spent hours with my dusty living quarters: Oh, thank you for cleaning my apartment!!! Thank you for turning my dismal, smelly, filthy place back into a home for me. Maybe I could have done it myself, but thanks to your affordable rates, I can rest at ease and concentrate only on washing my chemical smelling dust covered clothing. You have lifted my burden!!!! (well you lifted the biggest part of the burden, in any case.)

To the rest of you: Cleaning services are worth every penny. Every penny. Also, the number of pennies required for services is fewer than I expected.

Now, perhaps I can rest in my apartment and breathe through any other stress I have allowed to accumulate in my life. Perhaps this wonderful apartment cleaning will inspire a brain cleaning!

Cheers,

Currently listening: The Live One By Greg Brown Release date: 17 October, 1995

Four Years

Current mood: sad

To my would-be future,

Well, it would have been four years.
Four years is a good long time.
Four has always been a lucky number for me.
I worked hard.
I laughed alot.
I cried some.
Made wonderful memories.
You did too.
Sometimes things were rough, but it all seemed somehow worthwhile, worth the time.
Mostly it was sweet, but sometimes it was sour.
I wonder if we only spoke the same language if things would be different.
Maybe we needed language classes, or a translator.
Keep your spirits up, I'll keep mine up too.

Always with love,
me

Rock!

Current mood: drained

Just got back from Albuquerque. The Platforms performed as part of the Hyperactive music festival there and we had a blast!! We got all dolled up in our pretty little outfits and rocked out! We were good, sure, but I was really impressed with all of the talent that Albuquerque is hiding. Kudos to the Mindyset, the Hot IQ's(from Colorado) and especially the Dirty Novels for knocking my socks off!! I do believe that John Shoe had it right when he said that Albuquerque is "the best rock scene in America. I fucking swear."

Felt like a rockstar in my super-cute dress, fishnets, knee high black leather boots and large flashy earrings. I even made sure that my eye makeup was particularly wink-licious. It was a bit surreal walking down the street to the dropping jaws of boy after boy as we gals strolled by in full makeup and hot shoes.

It was also nice to breath the dry four corners air. It's been quite awhile.

Currently listening: Dirty Novels By Dirty Novels Release date: 06 April, 2004

busy bee

Current mood: indescribable

Matt tells me I should have taken my glasses off for my latest picture....Oh well.

So, I'm a busy busy girl these days. Yes, busy indeed. I'm taking an LSAT prep course (which I'm very dissatisfied with) that eats all of my time, I'm tutoring the hairdressers boys, band practice two sometimes three times weekly, and all of this right before the Platforms head out on tour!!! I'd like to say something like "Woe is me!! Why must I make myself so busy??" but business is good...it's a sign one is living I suppose.

Now, if I could only fill up my business with art projects and furniture building, instead of what I actually fill my time up with. Does that desire mean I shouldn't study Law?? Uh oh, identity crisis...creeping in...trying to avoid the busies...

Perhaps next month will be easier....yes, I'm sure...

Ahhh the traveling life

Current mood: mellow

It's early Thursday morning and I'm still on the road. I left Austin yesterday, flew to Houston...waited...flew to Salt Lake City...waited...walked around the airport some more...waited...bought a buck o' nine salad from Burger King...waited...talked to my dad on the phone about real estate...waited....decided to go to the gate. Pleasent surprising chaos awaited me at the gate! Time to wake up?? People were swarming, I found a seat.

Delta decided to board all thirty of their flights in a five minute period, and one after another they started announcing they were over booked. MY TURN "The flight to Medford, OR has been over booked if you are interested in volunteering to stay behind for compensation please see the agent at the podium."

Picture me (and remember my hair is very blond now) casually walking up to the gate agent. I asked her what the compensation package included.

So I'm writing this blog from the comfort of my Radisson Hotel room in Downtown Salt Lake City. I ate room service for dinner. I woke up early and have been watching the sun rise over the beautiful, snow-covered Rocky Mountains (picture me back in Colorado, 'cause that's where I've been picturing my self). They've given me meal vouchers which I will be using very soon to eat breakfast, and they've given me many Delta Dollars which I will be able to use to buy my ticket to attend my good friend Sarah's wedding.

Now if only I had a change of clothes for my flight to Medford....OH well, looking forward to seeing my Dad and Lindea and my cats and perhaps some long lost Oregon friends.

Currently listening: Moon Pix By Cat Power Release date: 22 September, 1998

I'm the lead singer in a band!!!

Current mood: ecstatic

So I figured since I was going to be living in Austin, I had better pursue my secret musical ambitions. I looked for auditions almost as soon as I looked for a place to live. I found one, with a wonderful group of boys called Red Book Audio, but it didn't seem like they were in need of another band member, and I guess they reached the same conclusion. I was sad, but kept my chin up, figured there had to be a good match for me out there. weeks went by, a month or more-- maybe even two--of me searching the adds in the Austin Chronicle and Craigslist. I thought I was done for when I received an email from Satan saying he'd like to get together to see if our styles were a match. Finally a group of girls said they needed a vocalist to replace the one they had and I jumped for it. Long story truncated: They Picked ME! Check out MY BAND's myspace site. Looks like I'll be doing more than just singing, I'll be playing the part of a bombshell dynamo with perhaps a little bit of spy background. You won't see my name on posters, instead you'll see the name of my stage persona. She hasn't been named yet, but i can feel her growing inside. Cheers to me!

I made muffins this morning

Current mood: cheerful

I love the smell of fresh baked items. This morning I made, from an organic kit I purchased at whole foods, lovely apple cinnamon muffins. They were wonderfully fluffy and good. A week ago I had made some apple cinnamon muffins from a kit I purchased at HEB. Those were not fluffy, and tasted like candy. I believe that the idea of healthfood being bland, is quite simply an outdated opinion from yesteryear, and healthy tastes much much better then conventional anymore. Hurray for muffins!

ouch

Current mood: annoyed

I'm feeling low. The ground might feel nice to lay on, I dunno. I gained an inch or two over the holidays and in my desperation to maintain my hard earned slim build because I can't afford to go shopping for a whole new wardrobe (and I liked the way I looked when I came home from Korea), I over did it. WAY over did it. MY back hurts and I have no one to blame but my self. It hurts so bad, that when I walk I look like I not only wear diapers but I must be carrying a load in em. It hurts so bad, that I can try to get it on with my honey, as long as gettin' it on means laying very very still and hoping it doesn't hurt. It hurts so bad, that I have to make Matt do all of the work, carry the groceries, drive, open the frickin' wine bottle to the point where I don't feel pampered but like some freakish invalid who has to be cared for. Seriously. I'm at that point right after the realization that something is wrong, but before the part where the wrongness is ridiculously funny. Not laughing at myself in this moment...maybe tomorrow.

Matt bought a truck. He wants me to be excited. I told him I am, but I guess scraping an excited facial expression off of the floor wasn't convincing. Now if I can just manage to get in 20 minutes of cardio before bed. Aw fuck it. One more glass of wine please.

a long silence

Current mood: thirsty

So it turns out that the reason I haven't written in my blog for a very long time, is that the burden of trying to put updates in here was far too great for me. I felt weighed down by the idea that I needed to follow up on my job interview experience, or that I shoud tell you how much I enjoy climbing in my new petzl harness. The idea that somehow this blog could not progress unless I played catch up, became more important than excercising my brain enough to commit words to screen. Similar really is my history with diaries, dream logs, and travel journals. So this is my announcement to self and to all that if you're looking for a regularly updated saga of my life--a sit-com/soap of my daily experiences in episode form, you're not likely to find it here. There, I feel so relieved. Now perhaps I can start writing things down again!